Just like other bloggers, I love receiving comments.
Comments give others the chance to share their opinions.
Comments also build community.
But, what happens when we don’t like the words written in a comment?
Today’s Lesson
Have you ever read a blog post that moves you, but when you try to comment, the words don’t flow?
Or maybe you’ve written a comment, but after rereading it, you delete it?
I do that.
I’ll type out my thoughts, reread them and realize how silly or unsuitable they are for the post.
Or, maybe I’ve said more than what I want to share online.
“Delete”
Sometimes I will write another comment, but oftentimes I just click off and move on.
I find this happens when I’m tired or have a lot on my mind. My brain is not into commenting.
Mike Goad does the same thing.
In a recent comment he wrote,
I try to stay reasonably short [in blog posts]. Sometimes when it’s done, I go back and delete some of the material that isn’t as pertinent.
I try to do that in comments, too. Sometimes, my comments get way too long. 😉
When we think about the comments we leave on other blogs, they become part of our virtual footprint. If we’re tired, brain dead or not in the mood, it’s probably best to just move on.
Once we hit “submit”, it’s out there. For the whole world to read.
Although I’d never delete a legitimate comment on this blog, (unless you asked me to), when leaving comments on other blogs, sometimes the “delete’ button is my best friend.
What say you?
Today’s Assignment
Do you ever delete your comments?
If so, do you rewrite them or just move on?
Care to share?
.
Yes, all the time. In fact, just today! Sometimes I think I want to leave a comment, but then decide never mind. Other times I rewrite it at a later time when I can find the words I want to say. I don’t know that I have ever gone back and deleted something after I posted it, though. It’s usually before I hit “publish”.
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Hi Debbie,
That works good, doesn’t it? Going back to a post at a later date when the brain is rested and our thoughts flow easier.
I sometimes struggle with a comment, write and rewrite. I rarely give up though. 🙂
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Hi Vered,
I commend you for not giving up. Although I try not to, sometimes the words just don’t come.
As I was reading through this post, I was already composing my response in my mind… and, well, I guess I don’t need to. Thanks for the mention!
There have been times where I have written a comment — of various lengths — and then simply decided not to submit it.
.-= Check out Mike Goad´s awesome post: Gunnison Point =-.
You’re welcome Mike,
I hear you. Sometimes after rereading what we write, we just don’t feel comfortable hitting “submit”.
I used to feel like I needed to leave a comment on every post that I read and liked. !!! But, hello?, that was just impossible. I do occasionally delete a comment I begin leaving. I most definitely edit (maybe not ALL the time). But I am actually now A-okay with being a lurker: I can enjoy the post and put my two cents in another time. If I can’t further or add to the discussion, then why am I commenting?
Hi Chania Girl,
That’s a good point. We don’t have to comment on every post we read. Although most blog authors would like it if we did, I’m sure they understand time is often an issue.
YES, I’ve done this. Sometimes I have a great point but get interrupted by family and life and when I go back I just delete because the thought process is gone.
Other times, I might find my comment too serious or too light for the situation. I always remember the saying, “Sometimes it is better to say nothing at all.”
Typically, I like to leave comments though. Stat counters are nice to see visits but I know I personally like to hear feedback from my friends and readers. So, I try to do the same and return the favor.
😉
.-= Check out Farmers*sWife´s awesome post: School Awards! I passed as a parent! 🙂 =-.
Hi Farmer’s Wife,
That’s very true. Blog authors like to personally hear from their readers. Even though our numbers may go up, comments verify our words are being read.
Sure, I delete comments from time to time. I’ll get three or four sentences in and realize I have absolutely nothing to say, no point to make. Once in a blue moon, I’ll start writing a very negative reaction to a post or comment. Almost always I resist the temptation to publish. Cooler heads should always prevail, I think. From time to time, commenters on my blog have sent me an email requesting I edit their comment – usually for clarity. My readers tend to be writers and it drives some of them nuts when they leave out a word or spell it wrong. I’ll have to admit it bothers me, too, but I’ve never taken the step to ask for a comment edit.
.-= Check out Brad Shorr´s awesome post: Simple Sentences – How to Eliminate Semicolons, Part 2 =-.
Hi Brad,
You’ve raised a good point. When a blog post ignites a negative reaction, it’s easy to go with our first instinct and want to argue, but like you said, resisting that temptation is often the wiser move.
Hi Barbara
I thought for one horrible moment that you meant that you delete real comments on your blog… I can rest easy knowing you didn’t mean that.
I sometimes look at my spam comments and try to convince myself that they are real comments, but usually don’t succeed.
I’ve started many comments that I’ve never finished – just gave up.
I try and comment on posts that I have an interest in or that spark a memory or an emotion or a quote sitting somewhere in my subconscious.
Just turning your statement on its head… has anybody, in a cry for help, written a comment on their own blog?
Actually… that’s not a bad idea. LOL
.-= Check out Keith Davis´s awesome post: Laugh and the world… =-.
Hi Keith,
LOL Yes. you can rest easy. 🙂
Leaving comments on our own blog? That’s actually a strategy that’s used to start a conversation in the comment section. I’ve heard of some who will comment on their own blog under a different name to try and start controversy, but to me that sounds like way too much work.
That said, if a blog author thinks their readers don’t know they can leave comments, I think it could be beneficial for the blog author to start the comments by writing the first comment and saying something like, “To add to what I just published, …..” as a way of showing their readers how and where to comment. (not on every post though)
Also, some of the scam sites have “canned commenters” that claim they used “xyz” (product or service) and are thrilled with it, blah, blah, blah… as a way to con readers into buying or signing up. Those are pretty easy to spot as the comments do not link back to anyone, and if they do, those sites are usually spam sites, too.
But…. that’s not to say a comment without a link is spam. Some of our commenters are readers only and do not have a blog to link to.
Wow. I feel like I just wrote a blog post on commenting on our own blogs…. See what you started, Keith? 🙂
Hi Barbara
Like the idea of getting the ball rolling with…
“To add to what I just published, …..”
Thanks for a great summary of commenting on your own blog.
.-= Check out Keith Davis´s awesome post: Laugh and the world… =-.
Yes, I ponder, edit, and sometimes delete when my thoughts don’t seem to add much.
One rule I learned early is never write anything, including a comment, after consuming alcohol.
.-= Check out Lori Hoeck´s awesome post: Self defense and owning your survival =-.
Hi Lori,
I agree with your rule. Do not comment on blogs after consuming alcohol. Oh what a trail of interesting comments that could produce. 🙂
Barbara — I am so excited…I’m not LATE this time. Most of the time when I get to your site, you’ve already got 50+ comments.
Regarding your questions: I will delete my comments if I feel my heart is not in what I’m saying and I’m just leaving a comment because I should. That’s usually a indication that I need to take a break.
It’s important to me to fully read a post and make a relevant comment. There have been times when I didn’t understand the post :~) or it just didn’t sit well with me. If this happens, I usually move on without leaving a comment.
I’ve deleted sections of a comment and rewritten comments if I felt I wasn’t clear. Since I talk aloud when I write, I make lots of mistakes in my comments…some I catch and a lot I miss.
My biggest issue with commenting is that I TALK way too much:~)
p.s. I love what Lori said about not commenting after alcohol consumption…that should written as a RULE. Yeah Lori:~)
Hi Sara,
That’s true. If we don’t understand what the blog author is trying to convey, it’s hard to construct a meaningful comment. In those cases, I’m like you and move on.
P.S. I don’t think you talk too much. 8)
Oh, I definitely have, but a lot of times I delete them in my mind before I even start typing. If I don’t think it doesn’t really contribute to the discussion (such as, the last 50 people have already said the same thing), I wouldn’t even bother commenting. Also, I have removed parts of the comments that weren’t as relevant when I was typing in the comment box and realized “Holy crap, that was a long comment!”
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Hi Kelvin,
That works good, doesn’t it? Editing out parts of our comments if we think they’ve gotten too long. That said, in some cases a long comment can add tons of value to a blog post.
Great po –
*delete*
Loved the topi-
*delete*
Just kidding. Here’s the real stuff. This is the reason I don’t post comments all that often – the “think” factor.
Sometimes, I just like the post (and I do read/visit blogs far more than I comment) and have nothing to add, other than “Great post”.
Then there are times where I get a knee jerk reaction, I’ll write out the rant, and then delete after I’ve thought about it. And definitely do not attempt late at night when there’s the slight possibility you may hit “Submit” instead of “Delete”.
On my own blogs? Comments usually aren’t edited or deleted, unless they’re something really nasty.
.-= Check out Deb Dorchak´s awesome post: The Price of Inspiration =-.
Hi Deb,
Don’t you think that has gotten bred into us? As bloggers we’ve learned we shouldn’t just say, “Good post” even though at times those two simple words cover it. So in an effort to not sound “spammy” we feel we have to write more, but if the words don’t come, we leave saying nothing.
Yes, to all of the above questions at times. Sometimes the words just don’t match what I really want to say. Sometimes, like you, I decide to rewrite. Other times, I decide to move on. Sometimes the article is just right without me trying to add anything new to it.
.-= Check out Patricia – Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker´s awesome post: Three Year Old Adultress Revisited – Inner Child Letters Series – 1 =-.
Hi Patricia,
I like how you put that, “Sometimes the article is just right without me trying to add anything new to it.” Amen.
I only share my view through comment while I really want to do that else I move. So, don’t really use delete button but use the edit button 2-3 time in my 1 and half year blogging career.
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Hi Arafat,
Yes. On some blogs, we may not even want to comment. If that’s the case, we read and move on. I find I do that on blogs posts where I don’t have an opinion on the topic and don’t care to form one.
Many times I have started to make a comment and when finished I just delete it after reading it.
You are right, most of the times is when being tired and the mind is just not working “properly”, then, out of respect for the blogger and the blog I just prefer to stay “silent” instead of writing something that won’t contribute, or at least, make sense.
In other times when there’s a different opinion and a comment could lead to hurt feelings then I also stop and prefer not to comment. No reason to start digital fights!
Raul
.-= Check out Alien Ghost´s awesome post: About Love And Castles =-.
Hi Raul,
That’s true. If the blog author has a different opinion than us, although we know our opinion is important, we don’t comment because as you said, we don’t want “to start a digital fight”.
Too often I’ve seen comments where the commenter attacks the blog author instead of just disagreeing with the topic. When that happens, it’s not pretty.
Nope, I guess I’m the contrary person around here. I don’t start to write a comment until I’ve thought about what I want to say, and once I get going, then it’s there, plain and simple. Then again, I can be mouthy, so I figure folks eventually will expect that of me. 🙂
.-= Check out Mitch´s awesome post: Thoughts About The Images? =-.
Hi Mitch,
It sounds like your thought process is very precise. At times I find I can spit out a comment pretty easily, but other times I spend more time on a comment than I do on some of my blog posts. Yikes!!!!
Barbra,
Yes, more often than not.
Hi Bruce,
Have no fear. I know you’re a new blogger and with practice, the commenting process starts to get easier and easier. Thus far, I think you’ve done great.
Hey Barbara,
Great thoughts as always. I sometimes think of changing all of my keys on my keyboard to delete. It’d save a lot of time.
I’m joking. I love comments. I often write more on other people’s comments than in my own blog. For me, the participation of commenting with good pertinent information is what makes you a good blogger.
Julie
.-= Check out Julie @ jbulie’s blog´s awesome post: Facebook ~ the good, the bad and the unexpected. =-.
Hi Julie,
All delete keys? Oh boy! That would be interesting. 😆
What you said is very true. Our comments on other blogs do make us better bloggers, plus they can also entice others to come by and check us out. It’s a win-win.
Barbara,
My editor *never* rests. I can’t help but tweak what I’ve written; it’s like a game. As Deb says, the “think factor” is an issue; can become time-consuming and if I’m not careful, I make more work than necessary. I do say the same thing a lot, but I still mean what I’m saying even if I’m saying it for the millionth time. Just need to expand my vocabulary a bit 🙂 Sometimes I don’t have a lot to say, but I want to *wave* on my way around the blogosphere with a short, supportive comment. And, yep… I edited this one.
.-= Check out Davina´s awesome post: I Know You Interest Me =-.
Hi Davina,
Spoken like a true writer (and professional proofreader); “the editor never rests.”
I hear what you’re saying about “waving” your way around blogosphere. Even if our comments may not add a lot of value to a post, it does tell the blog author we’ve been there, and as Farmer’s Wife (see comment above) mentioned, that’s more appreciated by the blog author than just a spike in traffic.
Farmer’s Wife is absolutely right. The appearance is appreciated. What I’ve noticed too is that some bloggers comment less than others. It’s always a nice surprise to see their avatar show up in the comment section. Like a friend calling who you haven’t heard from in a while.
.-= Check out Davina´s awesome post: I Know You Interest Me =-.
That’s true, Davina,
Some bloggers do comment less than others, and I know for myself, if I’m swamped at work or am busy with life or making headers for The Blog Boutique, my visiting time becomes a lot more limited.
I like the analogy of “a friend calling….” 🙂
Hi Barbara,
I don’t delete my comments. I’m sure I would if my words didn’t represent me well. Blog authors are sharing energy through their blogs, so when I visit a blog, I want to have the best energy possible–an open mind, ready to read and find what is appropriate to *me*. I comment to show my appreciation, but there are many times I do not leave comments because nothing stood out to me. If I am tired or for some reason “not on” I leave blogland….
Keith asked if anyone has written a comment on their own blog. When I have guest authors, I try to be the first to comment…(LOL sometimes someone sneaks in!). On occasion I may comment if after reviewing my post that has been published I feel there is pertininent information that will prompt discussion.
Hi Joy,
That’s great advice. Sometimes it’s best if we just leave blogland and get refreshed.
Re: When we have a guest author. I think it’s important to show our readers we’re still involved and by leaving a comment, like you do, verifies that.
I used to spend too much energy trying to avoid mistakes. Now, I just make mistakes, learn, and move on … it helps me grow faster. In terms of comments, I just think of them as getting up to bat … sometimes I strike out, sometimes it’s a single or double … and sometimes it’s a home run. In any case, I can’t hit the home runs if I don’t take a swing 😉
As one of my mentors puts it, in 100 years it won’t matter … so that really helps me put any inner-critics in perspective.
.-= Check out J.D. Meier´s awesome post: Lessons Learned from John Maxwell =-.
Hi J.D.,
I like your mentor’s advice. In 100 years none of this will matter so as you said, it teaches us to cut ourselves some slack.
I enjoyed the “going up to bat” analogy. It’s a great reminder we’re not always going to get it right and shouldn’t worry if we don’t. 🙂
Very rarely and never because of length. The more, the better for both of us, as long as it’s relevant.
The only real time is when I passive-aggressively inform someone of my thoughts (a skill in itself), and realize it was more aggressive then passive. lol
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LOL Dennis,
Yes. Relevant comments can end up being lengthy, value packed and can also benefit those who are reading the replies. If we start deleting, we could end up distorting the message.
I attempt to least say hello when I have read a blog post, so I leave a lot of comments….I do not leave a great many comments on one group of news or architecture blogs I visit – they never leave any comments in return.
I still feel as though my comments are too long and too wordy, and have been consciously working on being more precise.
.-= Check out Patricia´s awesome post: 35 Million =-.
Hi Patricia,
Dropping by to say “hello” plus something to the affect of “great post” is a good way to let fellow bloggers know we came by.
Writing shorter comments that are value packed is a knack, but one I think can be attained with practice. However, just like when we write our posts, it’s easier to write a comment just as we’d be speaking.
I never delete any comments I’ve made. I figure that they always reflect where I’m at at the time, so why edit myself? I’m a work in progress anyways. We all are. We’re bound to say or write something at some point that we wish we hadn’t. Mistakes are part of being alive and hopefully we’ll learn from them. 🙂
I’m kinda like a reformed porn star that way. My past will always be out there for people to see, but I’ll hopefully have moved on.
Erm… I wouldn’t blame you if you decided to delete those last two sentences. 😛
Hi Tony,
I see no reason to delete your last two sentences as they show your personality, your fun side. 😉
I do agree. We’re all going to leave comments where later we say, “what was I thinking?”, but like you mentioned, we grow and learn from our mistakes. Those old mistakes are a great marker to show how far we’ve come.
Hi Barbara .. if I can write straight away then I do. But often I wirte in Word, copy it over, – that also means if the net swallows it .. I don’t have to rethink to rewrite it.
Quite a lot of blogs require some thought to give a pertinent answer and I don’t like leaving a running footprint that I’ve been here!
I try and make my comments relevant to the post .. not always I suspect .. join in the conversation. I like JDs analysis .. in real life we’re not perfect .. so as long as we do our best here that’s important .. I certainly get put off by ridiculous inane thoughts if they get put anywhere .. we might think them, but don’t write them ..
Thanks – better stop! .. have a great Memorial Day .. Hilary
.-= Check out Hilary´s awesome post: Stirling Castle Skeletons – who are they? =-.
Hi Hilary,
I can see how your method of commenting would help to reduce the amount of time we spend editing comments (within the comment box).
I do agree. There are some blog posts which take a lot of thought if we want to leave a relevant comment. I don’t know about you, but for those, I need to be rested in order to soak it all in and then construct a decent comment.
Hi Barbara .. thanks for that – yes .. that’s why I’m ‘late’ sometimes & also I’ve a lot going on – but things are sorting out .. so my brain isn’t terribly with it a lot of times! So I need to feel I can cope as such before I comment – as I want to make it relevant.
Another brief question .. I don’t get any comments across to my email and nor do I from some other blogs (not all) – it’s a strange anomaly .. and with a couple of the blogs – Lance for some reason .. suddenly I have to complete my details each time before I comment.
Just thought a) you might know! or mull on & b) you might know where to go to ‘solve’?
No worries .. if it’s too much .. I’ll work another plan, when I’m organised.
Have a good weekend … Hilary
.-= Check out Hilary´s awesome post: Stirling Castle Skeletons – who are they? =-.
Hi Hilary,
I’ve been thinking about why you have to re-enter your information in the comment box. I “believe” it’s a browser problem and not a blog problem.
If you check your security settings on your browser, you may have the security so strong it’s not allowing sites to use “cookies”. To check, go to “Tools” > “Internet Options” > “Privacy” and then see what it says about “cookies”.
I could be wrong, so if someone else believes they know what the problem could be, please feel free to speak up.
Re: Email subscription. That I can’t figure out. 🙁
There are times when I indeed delete comments. Sometimes it’s as you said, I have a thought or an idea and the words just won’t express exactly what I wanted to. if I can’t get it right, I just drop the whole comment and move on. Other times i feel I am saying the same thing in 3 comments but in other words:) If i see my comment is almost as long as the post, I turn it into a post reply on my own blog and link to the original article, as I do believe there should be a limit in comment legth.
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Hi Alina,
It’s great to see you here. Since I haven’t been spending much time on Twitter, I’ve missed seeing you. 🙂
I like your idea of turning a long comment into a post of our own. As you mentioned, we can link to the blog post that inspired our article and it becomes a win-win for both us and the other blogger.
Hi Barbara, yes, both, I’ve deleted, and I’ve moved away from blogs and not commented after deleting. Trouble is I often do not go back once moving away, or I go back and there is a new blog post to comment on…. I liked Keith’s idea of commenting on your own blog….now there’s a thought….
Enjoy the journey.
Mandy
.-= Check out Mandy Allen´s awesome post: If you don’t have a go you’ll never know… =-.
Hi Mandy,
Good point. When we move away from a post because our comment doesn’t “feel right”. it’s easy to forget to go back when we’re rested or have some spare time.
Hi Barbara,
I delete, rewrite, and start over quite often. I have to be satisfied with what I’ve written, and comments go through much the same process as a post.
Also, thanks for the follow.
You’re welcome Linda,
You sound like me. Comments are like mini posts; subject to the same editing process. And some, just don’t make the grade. 🙂
I try to comment earlier in the day. When I’m still fresh. Of course that is in an ideal world, where everything goes the way I want it. Sometimes I have no choice and I find myself, rambling on aimlessly, saying nothing, getting nowhere, contributing nothing of value, just babbling, barely coherent…
Oops! Sorry I’ll try not to do that anymore. *:*
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Cute comment Joella, 🙂
Commenting earlier in the day might work better as we’re more apt to be rested, but like you said, that’s in an ideal world. I know with my schedule, I’m usually commenting late in the day and if my brain is fried, the words just don’t come.
LOL. I do delete my comments when I read it aloud to myself and I can hear the blog moderator saying “CR*P! Yet another backlink chaser. Why is Akismet misbehaving today?” lol
I’ve only mistakenly deleted a legitimate comment once and that’s because I was feeling mighty sleepy. Luckliy for me I still had the comment notification email so I just posted the comment back myself using the commenter’s details ;-).
Hi Udegbunam,
I know what you’re saying. When we reread what we write, sometimes it’s best to just delete it, start over or just click off.
Yes. When we’re tired it’s easy to make mistakes. All the more reason to get rest instead of trying to do too much in a day.
I frequently erm… how shall we say… ‘make pretty’ other people’s comments in the interest of uniformity and, in some cases, to make them legible. But rarely do I delete them altogether – unless they blatant spam.
Hi Martin,
Like you, I only delete spam comments on my blogs. However, if I’m writing a comment on another blog, if the words don’t flow, I’m apt to delete my own words.
When commenting, I typically write out whatever I’m thinking and then go back and edit, edit, edit before posting it. Sometimes, when I read back over the comment, I hate what I wrote and will delete it and start over. If I can’t get the words to come out right, I will just bookmark the post I want to comment on and come back to it later after I’ve had time to think over what I want to say.
Hi Ven,
I hear you, and I like your idea of bookmarking a post we want to comment on later. Sometimes all it takes is for us to have time away from the topic to think about it, and then the words come easier.